Advice not given

The clearer we see who we are and our innate qualities as human beings the clearer we see it in others, and we naturally become more impactful and effective in serving the people in our community.

I'm often asked "so how do I do that?", "what are the tools?". My best how-to tool is simple "stay in the conversation, continue exploring and you may be surprised by what you see." We often turn, and sometimes we even run away from the conversation because we fear what will happen when we dare not be afraid of loosening the grip on what we think we know. That's human. All it means is that in those moments we listen not from an open mind and open heart but to the intellect/ego.

I've noticed that a lot of times when we listen to people struggling with the human experience we are quick to jump to conclusions, to give advice and let them know about all the ways in which they can fix, change or let go off what is being experienced. Regardless of whether the advice is to fix what's being felt on the inside or change what is outside of us that looks like it is causing the feelings on the inside.

All of it well-meaning, and I can't help but think that the motivation for the advice is an undiscovered belief that we as human beings are inherently broken and therefore in need of fixing, and that we as the ones struggling have to look for answers outside of us because we ourselves operate under an undiscovered belief that we are not Enough. That we do not already have within us the answers that will effortlessly remove the invisible mountain of our own hidden beliefs about who we are and what we can and can not do. ​That we are Enough.

Advice, no matter how well-meaning does nothing or very little for the person asking for or getting the advice. Why? Because only we ourselves Know what is meaningful for us to do (or not do).

The biggest, best and most impactful tools and how to's arise from the silent space within. The space in which thought is flowing freely.

My best advice is to give no-advice, but simply to Listen.